Improving

Today is Day 3 of getting back on More Fit, Less Fat plan. I woke up at 5:30am, got out of the house a little before 6am, and did my usual route around the Panhandle. I've been jogging two laps around the park, which is about three miles, and walking up there and back. So, I walk/jog/run a total of about four miles each morning. I'm trying to get this back up to five, six, seven, eight, nine miles. I was there before, and I can get there again. But, no pressure. It's just me now trying to get myself there and beyond (Winnie moves to Providence in a few weeks). I'm going to take it as slowly as I need while still pushing myself to be faster and to be able to run longer distances.

I'm seeing improvement already. I didn't once feel the slightest urge to vomit today (hurrah!). I was able to run longer without needing to stop. My body felt right and not sluggish. Once I get over that first 3/4 mile, the running gets a little easier and a little more comfortable. I have to remind myself that my body is just slow at warming up and not feel guilty for needing to take a walking break.

I also came home afterward to do some work with my little weights and strength building. I was more sweaty than I remember being for a while, with sweat just dripping off my face. I still hate crunches.

Also, in my more concerted effort to better myself, especially physically, I told Alvin I would play volleyball with the work team that meets every Tuesday night and plays with other non-profits. The season starts next week, but I might not make it for most of the first half since I signed up for a French class that meets Tuesday and Thursday nights.

The last time I remember playing volleyball was in the 6th grade. I remember playing in the hot sun and my feet burning from the toasty asphalt. I hope I made that clear enough to Alvin for him to understand that I will most likely be the worst player on the court. My height and reach won't help if I can't coordinate my hand with my eye and hit a ball. I also need to get over my fear of getting whacked in the back of my head with a ball.

I was chatting with Billy, who has been playing for a while now, about my concerns. He was understanding while telling me I just need to get over it all. He reminded me that I can't be afraid of being bad and feeling like a failure, and that it will take time and practice to get better. I can't get good without being horrible at first. This feeling of wanting to be good (or at least not being a disaster) at everything instantly isn't just isolated to volleyball but I've been noticing it in so many other aspects of my life. I'm hoping that this volleyball challenge will help me think about the other parts of my life that can be worked on, and that I can't be afraid of getting hurt, diving in headlong, getting hit in the head.

Also, volleyball will give me a legitimate excuse for being bruised.